Wednesday, September 27, 2006

39 Cent Stamps and Other Things in the Ghetto

I'm still a little confused over the 39 cent stamp. It seems like just a few months ago (actually, it really WAS just a few months ago) that I bought a bazillion 37 cent stamps - really cute ones, too, with Muppets on them. Beaker, Chef, Animal, Miss Piggy... the whole gang. Then, about 2 weeks later, the USPS decides to up the ante again. Great... Here it is, several months after the fact and I have refused to buy the 2-cent stamps. That is, until yesterday... I caved. I bought 40 of them - to get me through the 40 37-cent stamps I still have. Sumbeach.

I got a call from Officer Morales who kindly informed me that he is closing the two cases against the ghetto neighbors - one for noxious weeds and the other for bark mulch in the road. He says, "Thanks to you your neighborhood will remain a nice place to live." It sounded somewhat sarcastic to me, so I took offense. Just cuz I'm the only one with enough danglers to call the City, even though ALL of the neighbors are complaining about it doesn't make me the neighborhood snipe. Seriously.... Is it really that hard to mow the weeds or spread the bark mulch that you bought in relatively short order?

He also told me that I should call City Enforcement regarding the birds and the parking situation.... This stuff is wearing me out.

Do roosters crow in the winter? Just curious. Maybe we'll get one of those super NW winter freezes and it'll freeze the little bastard's throat. (As a disclaimer, I do not hate animals and would never intentionally harm one. But there is a place for farm animals and it is NOT in the suburbs.)

I love Cliff Bars, but, really, they are like chewing on petrified turds. (Not that I have ever experienced chewing a petrified turd.) How on earth they can make a bar 3 inches by 2 inches weigh a pound, I will never know.

My hair seems to be falling out more frequently. Maybe it's my imagination, or maybe it's just time for a hair cut. Probably is time for a color change, too, now that it's fall.... oh, and the fact that I look like white trash with my 1 1/2 inch roots. Very classy.

My new neighbors rock. Diego and his wife brought over homemade tamales. May I just say they were sent from Heaven by little Mexican angels? Note to self: keep in good with the new neighbors. Ya never know when they might shower me with homemade tamales again.

I've been meeting with my new accountability partner. It has been about 5 years since I've had one. I highly recommend getting one. She's tough, thoughtful, straight forward, and challenging. I love her. And she makes me think. Think hard.... About a lot of stuff. God is good.

What's the deal with back fat? My husband says it sounds like a Vietnamese guy's name: Bak Phat. Either way, I don't like it.

Our friend left Farmers yesterday. I will not incriminate anyone here, other than the stupid heads in the Farmers' HR department. Seriously, I am appalled at the way they treat their employees over there. Anyone working for Farmers knows what I'm talking about. They have completely taken the "human" out of their human resources, and are trying to turn their employees into robots. They have successfully created a performance standard that even a super-human could not maintain. Way to go, corporate A-holes. So, I give my friend a huge high-five for standing up to them and not compromising his ethics or his character. That fricken rocks.

I hate ADP's ezLabor software. It is so not ez. What was suppose to cut our time spent on timekeeping, has more than quadrupled our time, in addition to causing me great stress. No matter what some people may say, technology is not always all it's cracked up to be.

I'm looking forward to vacation.

Peace out, friends.

Wednesday, September 6, 2006

Update on the Rooster Next Door

That damn rooster's head isn't chopped off after all. I didn't hear it for a couple of days, so I thought that perhaps the City finally came out and confiscated the stupid bastard. But... nope. It is starting to interfere with my ability to focus on season 2 of "24". Sad, but true.

Now don't get me wrong. I love animals. But there is a place for everything, and roosters just don't belong in the backyard of a suburban home, living underneath the swing set. My prayer is that the falcon (oh, yes, they have a falcon, too) would somehow peck its way out of its cage and eat the rooster. That would be something special. And, really, it would be perfectly natural.... Survival of the fittest and all of that.

Friday, September 1, 2006

Random Thoughts

My best friend and I played phone tag for a few days. She told me she had news, so... of course I HAD to know. Scott and I immediately thought she must be pregnant because what else would have her so excited. I knew she wasn't engaged cuz she already said she didn't want to get married again (like a billion times... adamantly). It couldn't be a new house... Well, we finally connected this morning, and (drum roll please)... She is pregnant! Holy cow! She's very excited about being a mom, and I can't help but be excited for her. Disappointing that she and her man-friend have decided not to marry (seems the way of the world anymore). I'm totally bummed that I'm not in the same state now. (Particularly cuz, for those of you who don't already know, Scott and I are "trying" (in a very loose sense).) It would be way cool to have our babies around the same time. Obviously, she'd be a few months ahead of me. She's going to make a cute little pregnant person. Tiny people always do.

So, there's that. And it's Labor Day weekend, so at least we got that going for us. I was hoping that our ghetto neighbors would have their stupid bark mulch pile picked up by now, but alas, they do not. Somehow they defy all things logical and reasonable. But I haven't heard the damn rooster for a few nights now, so I wonder if they finally set him free. And by "free" I mean chop his noisy head off.

I just got the shiver-me-timbers. It must mean something.